These were the finishing lines of a recent article in Outlook
Business
While he’s happy with the changes brought about by Nitish Kumar’s
government, Doripar’s Sunder Lal misses one thing: “Development-shevelopment is
okay, but we miss Laluji’s humour,” he declares. “Bada achha majaak kar lete the!”
Malabar weeks:
I always wanted to be a ‘super star’, be admired, be someone who
inspires people. So I decided to star in an action flick. “Start with a family
cum romantic entertainer, like DDLJ” my first director said. So I fired him,
and found this new boy, who says yes to almost every change I make to ‘his’
script.
I never thought making a movie would be so easy. All I need to do
was tell my dad’s secretary that I wanted to act in a movie. Having a dad who
is the ex-chief minister and current cabinet minister helps.
The heroine, a newbie, imported from Kerala, sat near my chair
dressed in her negligee. I love the days when they shoot the duet songs. But
still wish it was the bubbly heroine from the recent box-office hit rather than
‘Malabar’ sitting near me. ‘She has dates problems sir, also having a newbie
paired with you would show you in much better light’ I was told. What he didn’t
tell me was that she and almost every other heroine outright cordoned off from
acting with me, especially after seeing the promos of the movie, the one which
has been spoofed a million times in facebook by now. I should have booked a
heroine and showcased her in the promos like John (the director kid) said. But made a note of all female actors who have
rejected our offer (it’s a long list). They’ll have to pay back for the
humiliation with interest.
The shooting for the dance sequence started. The song was a simple
melody, and the steps were easy. ‘Malabar’ running around me and sometimes both
of us doing aerobics kinda steps. By the end of the day happy & satisfied
with the day’s work(?) I asked John for preview of the day’s shoot.
Perplexed, he asked “Why sir? Any problems?” This was the first time
I had asked him to show the shots.
“No, I just wanna see how my first duet has come up”
I saw the video clips at home that night, and it made me speechless
for a while. I called Malabar in her cell (the one I gifted her on the first
day we met). She picked up after a while and greeted in a sleepy tone. “Want
anything sir?”
“No. Just saw the song we made today. You were good.”
“Thanks sir”, I could see her smile even through the receivers. ”You
were also extremely good” she replied
“You think so ? “
“Absolutely, I never thought someone could dance so well in their
first movie, and I still doubt you saying you have never danced before”
I may not be an expert in dance, but know when a dancer sucks, and
have myself made spoofs of umpteen no. of actors. I knew she was lying. Though
I liked her efforts to make me feel happy, I hated that she lied to my face (or
to my mobile). These are not the kind of people you could have around you if
you really want to succeed. I knew what to do the next day “Good night Malabar”
I wished her for the last time
The Real launch:
“I need to be the next Chief Minister. “ I told dad
“What about your movie? It’s not about the money, but having an
unfinished movie would be a bad PR, especially when you have it just before
entering politics.”
“It would be political and social suicide, if the movie actually saw
the lights of cinema halls” I told him the obvious without mentioning I sucked
“And don’t worry, I’ll take care of it”
The next day we made a relaunch of the movie, calling it ‘Real
launch’. We told the media that the initial ‘reel launch’ was just a publicity
gimmick for the spoof movie we make.
“The spoofs made on the ‘fake promo’ itself has given us no.of ideas
for our movie” I guffawed at the reporters
Since the start of our movie, this was the first time I could see
John with the burst of energy which he was when we first met. He’s a good kid,
he did everything to make sure I was at good spirits throughout the shooting, yet
he never lied to me blatantly like Malabar did. He had shown me that integrity
can be maintained without hurting others. I knew then that he would be someone
to watch out for.
The usual stuffs:
Dad had his ambitions for the highest post in the nation, and hence
was looking for someone to fill his shoes in the state during the next
elections. My uncle who seemed to be the heir apparent was gracious enough to
step down and pave way for young blood (This is what we publicised in the
media, the actual reason being the scandals on uncle the current ruling party
had recently ‘unearthed’ to foil our attempt on recapturing the state)
The election campaign was the most fun part. Being the opposition
party during elections is the easiest thing (next only to being a hero in a
movie sponsored by your dad). All you have to do is blame the current status of
the nation on the ruling government, which is nothing but stating the obvious,
and ask questions to public on why we don’t have this and why we are not that,
raising their still existing aspirations of living in Utopia even after facing
frustration after frustration from successive governments.
Of course there were varied ploys handled by our opposition to defy
my ambitions. Buoyed by the fact that he was competing against a relative
novice, the existing Chief Minister ran with renewed vigour for his
re-election. Lucky for me the state was in such a mis-governance that he had
nothing to show that would fool the people a second time.
So the next attempt was to make personal attacks on my eligibility
for the post and family politics in our party. Since he was doing this all
along when his own son in forties was waiting behind for a chance to be their
party’s leader, it gathered no mass. And I never defended any attacks on me,
since I knew that the best way to deal with such issues is to not recognise
them. And a particular tweet of a well-wisher became viral “Let’s vote for him, he’s
inexperienced, and so may not be able to loot like the seniors”
Angry Young man:
But there was one young lad, Pritam, who started his own ‘Youth
People’s Party’ who made some serious dent on my reputation. I initially did
not give much credence to his party, since the word ‘Youth’ in the name itself alienated
the vast majority of the voting population from his party. But the efforts he
had taken to logically compare my eligibility with the abilities required to
run a government frightened and irritated me. My dad and uncle hadn’t even
completed high school, and they had been running the state for decades. How could
a relative nobody question me, an Engineering graduate from one of the country’s
best institutions, about my ability? (Luckily he did not dig deep enough to
see how I got into the insti at first place or explore what my grades were
during the four years)
And frankly I don’t understand why they make such a fuss about
family politics? When they accept a business honcho names his son the
Vice-President or joins him in the board, they publish the smiling dad-son duo
in the covers of leading magazine, why not accept the same in issues of
governance? Moreover I had watched from close quarters how they had run the
government, experiences you could rarely get if you are born to a wage earner
or salaried employee in some remote part of the country. And I never had the
need to fight to reach the top, and it’s only the path to the top of the
pyramid that corrupts and creates the need to make compromises.
The party sleuths did try to unearth some dirt on Pritam, but to no
avail. He was born to a street vendor in one among the least developed
districts of the state, and grew all along by scholarships he earned with his
academic achievements. And to top it off, he had left a lucrative job and started
a by now successful social service organisation. So we decided to get him in
our party’s fold, but he flatly refused saying that he would never do such tree
hops to get political gains.
So in the next public speech I declared “We need youngsters like
Pritam serving for our nation. Our ideologies might differ, but motives same –
welfare of our people. We’d give him a ministerial post even if he lost in his constituency
or his party failed to get even a single vote”. That should have done the trick
I guess; all his supporters believing that he may not win, started moving
towards our party, the next best option, and it won numerous points among our
supporters and neutral observers. The pre-polls showed tremendous improvements
in our favour that week.
The biggest conflict though was internal, within the party, and most
importantly within me. Firstly many of
the party seniors did not like to be subservient to a kid not even half their
age. And many were appalled by my lack of knowledge on even the basic stuffs,
like the party’s history, and basic nuances they considered necessary to run
the party and the state. I overcame those thanks to private tea parties
arranged by dad and uncle with each of the senior party heads and private classes
on titbits I needed to know
But the more important issue was the conflict within, my attitude, which
many times was at logger heads with anarchic sentiments and expectations of the
senior men. My uncle, though himself being an old schooler, was surprisingly
understanding. He’d say “If you don’t like some rule, tolerate the rule, get to
the top and change the rule”. Of course there were exchange of suitcases and
promise of posts. But what I learnt was that politics, irrespective of the vast
amount of money and power, was primarily about the people and their egos.
It was only few days until the election date, and though was nervous
a little bit, I could feel an underlying calm. Strange are ways you feel when you
know that you have all things in control, irrespective of the losses you might incur
if you fail. If there is one thing that could fail me, it’d be my lack of good
public speaking skills. But I have the youngsters to my backing, party folk,
traditionalists, and the all-important common man and woman for my support. I could
never fail….
The Tiger Shark:
As I said, my speeches were not much to boast about, and I
intentionally avoided using bombastic verses written by my dad and his speech
writers. Thought it no longer strikes chord with the voter public. The only
interesting part of my election speech was the introduction ‘Spark’ Kumar gives
me before every meeting (sorry, uncle has advised to call it a ‘confluence’).
I like this intro very much
‘Sharks
can be dangerous even before they are born. One scientist was bitten by a tiger
shark embryo while he was examining its pregnant mother. Let’s give welcome
with thunderous applause the young tiger shark of our nation, the next Chief
Minister of our state’
and I’d follow my terse speech with few questions here and there, a
couple of jokes, and finally finish with the quote “I don’t want ‘my win’ in the
election, I want a ‘people’s win’ for the next five years”.
And I did win, by a huge margin, but did the people win?
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